In the face of the harm caused by parents, whether to choose to "ignore" is a complex and personal decision, and many factors need to be considered. The following are some thinking directions and suggestions, hoping to help you take a more comprehensive look at this issue： ### 1. **Admit your feelings first** -Harm is harm, whether the other party intends it or not. Denying one's feelings (such as "I shouldn't be sad, they are for my good") may suppress emotions for a long time and affect mental health. - You can try to record these feelings and clarify the specific behaviors of the injury (such as verbal belittling, control, neglect, etc.), which can help follow-up treatment. ### 2. **Distinguish between "ignoring" and "self-protection"** -**Blind disregard**: Forcibly suppressing emotions and pretending that the problem does not exist may lead to the accumulation of resentment or a reduced sense of self-worth. -**Conscious boundaries**: Temporarily keep your distance (physically or emotionally), give yourself space to digest the damage, and think about how to deal with it at the same time. This is a healthier approach. ### 3. **Assess the nature and intent of the injury** -**Unintentional**: Some parents are limited by their own growth experience and do not know how to express love, so they may inadvertently hurt others. If they are willing to listen and change, communication may improve the relationship. -**Continuous abuse**: If it is abuse (physical, mental, economic control, etc.), ignoring it may cause the injury to continue. At this time, you need to give priority to protecting yourself and even seek outside help. ### 4. **Try to communicate (under the premise of safety)** -If the relationship is possible to be repaired, it can be expressed in a nonviolent way of communication： -"When you do ______, I feel ______, and I need ______. " -For example: "When you compare me with others, I don't think I'm good enough. I hope you can be more sure of my efforts. " -**Note**: If your parents habitually deny your feelings or intensify them, stop communicating and give priority to self-protection. ### 5. **When to consider "ignoring"** -When there is no hope of changing the other party, and you are temporarily unable to leave (such as economic independence), you can strategically "ignore" it.： -Psychologically: recognize that their harm stems from their own problems, and do not deny their self-worth as a result. -Behavior: Reduce emotional investment, avoid topics that trigger conflicts, and turn your energy to self-growth. ### 6. **Long-term strategy** -**Establish a support system**: Friends, mentors, psychological counselors, etc. can provide emotional support to help you look at the problem objectively. -**Economic and emotional independence**: Gradually reducing dependence and enhancing autonomy will give you more room for choice. -**Redefine relationships**: As an adult, you can decide how far to keep from your parents. This is not selfishness, but self-responsibility. ### 7. **Warnings that should not be ignored** If the injury causes long-term depression, anxiety, self-loathing, or affects your interpersonal relationships, please be sure to seek professional psychological help. Trauma needs to be dealt with, not covered up forever. ### Finally Family relationships are often accompanied by a sense of contradiction between love and hate, which is normal. **Ignoring the pain will not make it disappear, but facing the pain does not have to be through confrontation-you can also choose to protect yourself gently and firmly. ** Your feelings are important and you deserve to be treated well. If you need more specific suggestions, you can add some details (such as your age, type of injury, whether you rely on your family, etc.), and I will try my best to provide further thinking directions.